MindlessChatter

Ok, first of all, f*** you guys and your persistent insistence that I read these damn books. While I haven't actually 'read' anything but a few chapters I have delved into the amazing world that Marsters does a damn fine job of bringing to light and have enjoyed every minute of it. I have finished the fourth book and can't wait to add more witty lines to my notes: "loopier than a crochet convention"! It gets me thinking, have you ever watched a movie or a television show that got you hooked? That drew you into the characters so well that you crushed when it ended? I get this way sometimes, mainly with movies. It ends and I want to follow their lives for a bit longer, wrap things up more completely, get another hint of mystery or an idea of who the characters are. The cliffhangers don't get me as much as just knowing that there is more to follow, a new adventure to start, and not a lot of mingling with the unfamiliar. I guess you guys have ...

Every time we get together, my brothers and I tend to get hung up on a word or phrase; arguing over the origin and proper use or, more likely, misuse. With today’s smartphones, we can quickly ping the interwebs for an answer usually leading to more chin scratching and the muttering of phrases such as: “Ah yes.  That makes sense” or “Really? It sounds more Russian than French”.  The funny things is that we have no idea what we are talking about, but we like to pretend. There have been many ……discussions over the years: rife; lineagey; remote; etc.  Tonight the word that caught our interest was smithereens. For some twisted reason the first thing I thought of was Mr. Smithers (I already said we didn’t know what we were talking about).  A quick search led us to a page explaining that Smithereens was Irish in origin and could be based on an old Gaelic word ‘Smiodar’ meaning fragments.  The article had a second origin that I actually prefer; “’smithereens’ … ...

  I don't know what happened here, but I think I like it. I'm not one to post just any old picture that I find from the internet. This made me laugh, absolutely, but then it got me to thinking... This kid may never even know about the smurfs. Our childhood cartoon heroes are essentially lost to the more recent generations and, instead, they will grow up with the Spongebob form of entertainment where stupidity and unintelligible humor are celebrated. Now, I am not, in any way, saying that The Smurfs was an extremely sharp and witty show. I am not saying that I learned a whole lot. I am saying that I think these shows had general messages, and characters that we could identify with. The Smurfs may be a bad example; if we throw Looney Toons, Animaniacs, Thundercats (they don't get talked about enough), and even Care Bears, I think I might make my point a little better. Bottom line is we have lost a bit of something and I want to get it back... even if I have to rip ap...

Sometimes it's the little things in life that get you through the day.  It could be a smile from a loved one, a giggle from a child, a blush from a co-worker when they finally get your double entendre, or the uncontrollable laughter over something that catches you off guard.  The last is my favorite. The best part about those moments is that they often lead to inside jokes that cannot be explained no matter how hard you try.  Often times the situation alone isn't that funny and retelling it only highlights that fact.  I can distinctly remember one night many moons ago, FCJ, Cap't Punc. and I were watching TV when a particular commercial came on interrupting our show.  I'm not sure what specific conditions were present that caused us to laugh so hard that we couldn't breath, wheezing out tiny squeals as we doubled over nearly passing out from lack of oxygen. It may have been the time of night, we didn't often get to stay up until midnight so in our defense ...

I was fighting with the BiblioChild3 for dominance of the comfy chair.   Things were going as planned; I was only paying partial attention to the battle while the rest of my attention was on focused elsewhere when he cheated. The little shit bit me.   Granted he was pinned, inverted, and out of options but that’s just…..not cool.  He knew it was out of bounds too because he ran upstairs giggling the entire way knowing that I wouldn’t spend the energy to chase him. Instead, I attempted to shake him to his core with a masterly use of linguistic threats.    “You cheated you little booger!”  I’m no Shakespeare but I can deliver the goods when necessary.    He responded with <giggle giggle giggle>”That’s what you get.”<giggle giggle giggle> “You had better not come back down here or I will give you a proper Charlie Horse.” He broke into a new fit of giggles as he ran upstairs.   2 minutes later he was alrea...

From time to time it is necessary to repair a household item.   Usually this is due to one of the children and a projectile that was ….projected within the confines of a small room.   Often times items just wear out and need replacing and the job of Mr. Fixit usually falls into my lap.   Unfortunately, we in my family seem to suffer from some sort of affliction that causes repairs to take longer than normally necessary.   The extra time can be attributed to a second trip to the hardware store to fix the replacement part that broke during installation.   This same pattern was displayed during my most recent repair man duties.   The toilet was leaking from under the tank.   My initial expert opinion led me to believe that the water line needed to be replaced.   Cue trip 1 to the hardware store.   10 minutes after returning home I had the line replaced, the floor dry and was about to enjoy a quite afternoon relaxing on the couch; alas ...

Bill Cosby once said "Kids say the darndest things." As a father of 3 children that routinely refrain from remaining r...silent. I've noticed a few categories: The crying babble THUNK! "AGGGHGHHHH!!!" Thump thump thuMP THUMP THUMP THUMP The child comes sprinting in to   the room trying to make as much noise as possible in an effort to demonstrate how injured he is. He pulls on your sleeve while donning the perfect injured face and starts to hyperventilate as he tries to tell you the story of the worst injury and injustice of all time. BC2: "DAD!!! Bibliochild1 hit me!! Itoldhimnottothrowthetoyandhedidn'tlistensoItriedtotakeitfromhimandbesafeandthenhehitme" #GASP D: "Calm down and tell me what happened." BC2: "I didn't do anything and Bibliochild1 hit me!" D: "You didn't do anything?" BC2: "No!   I was just trying to take the toy away so he didn't throw it" D: "...