MindlessChatter

"So, I need to learn golf."  Those words started something.  Apparently getting a sales job requires one to learn golf so that one doesn't make a fool of oneself whilst trying to make a sale on the course.   We started to meet early on Saturday mornings a the local public par 3 course designed for practice.  Figuring that practice on the small course would lead to less embarrassment on the larger courses.  This has proven somewhat true....but only just.  More on that later.   Grocery store visits included popping into the Goodwill store to see if I could find anything useful and well within by limited allowed budget.  My bag started to fill with a random assortment of $3 clubs allowing me to test different styles on the cheap. I eventually found an almost complete set of wedges and a new-to-me bag that finally allowed me to feel like I wasn't borrowing my child's clubs.     Since we started playin...

First let me apologize preemptively, J is a really nice guy, he means well, and past injuries combined with medical issues may have led to the current situation. Be that as it may, talking to him can be a bit of a challenge.   In a single conversation, he was somehow able to include: Flying cars and why can we have them Chinese cup therapy Ooo look at that explosion (news) Walking from elementary school to middle school Why can't they convert cars to use veg oil or natural gas, he knew a guy who had a car like that, it didn't make any pollution I've collected a few tidbits over the past couple of months.   Most of these are taken out of context, but to be fair most were never in context to begin with. Pointing at the tv: "what did they do? Put it on pets?" "I had chicken pox a bunch of times… then my family got a nice Mexican family and they had small pox…." "I had the same suit as ...

There is a new-ish addition to some theme park rides that takes the boredom away from sitting a ride out. The large raft rides that are popular at many theme parks are now accompanied by water cannons strategically placed along the raft route.  Now the younger sibling that are on the smaller side of tiny have the ability to get in on the action without the need to meet the height requirement, soaking the unsuspecting riders with a blast of chilly water; all for the price of a single quarter.  More often than not, parents are found at these lovely machines eagerly waiting to dish out some payback.  I've sat back and watched a few of these over eager parents and they all have the same first experience. Gleefully jamming a quarter into the water cannon, hands hovering over the button, eyes straining to get a glimpse of the telltale black hoodie indicating that my child is in the boat that just plummeted down the ramp, frustration felt after the realization that the boa...

Growing up in with my family had many advantages. One of the most valuable (at least in my opinion) is the sense of humor that each of us inherited and thrived upon.  Our parents (mainly Dad) wouldn't hesitate to poke fun at us, especially at stupid things we did.  It was all done in jest and he made sure to tell us that it was all in good humor and that no malice was intended; plus Mom would always follow up with some form of "we love you just the way you are, but that was really funny" making sure that we didn’t feel ostracized. Because of this profound upbringing we have all developed a sense of humor that allows us to laugh at our own faults, traits, and/or actions.  We can be kind of relentless towards each other, always with a smile and always with the intent to make the other laugh.  This can backfire.  I distinctly remember a time when we (I think just the four guys) were at a restaurant.  As usual jokes were flying back and forth and we were h...

Sometimes it's the little things in life that get you through the day.  It could be a smile from a loved one, a giggle from a child, a blush from a co-worker when they finally get your double entendre, or the uncontrollable laughter over something that catches you off guard.  The last is my favorite. The best part about those moments is that they often lead to inside jokes that cannot be explained no matter how hard you try.  Often times the situation alone isn't that funny and retelling it only highlights that fact.  I can distinctly remember one night many moons ago, FCJ, Cap't Punc. and I were watching TV when a particular commercial came on interrupting our show.  I'm not sure what specific conditions were present that caused us to laugh so hard that we couldn't breath, wheezing out tiny squeals as we doubled over nearly passing out from lack of oxygen. It may have been the time of night, we didn't often get to stay up until midnight so in our defense ...

I was fighting with the BiblioChild3 for dominance of the comfy chair.   Things were going as planned; I was only paying partial attention to the battle while the rest of my attention was on focused elsewhere when he cheated. The little shit bit me.   Granted he was pinned, inverted, and out of options but that’s just…..not cool.  He knew it was out of bounds too because he ran upstairs giggling the entire way knowing that I wouldn’t spend the energy to chase him. Instead, I attempted to shake him to his core with a masterly use of linguistic threats.    “You cheated you little booger!”  I’m no Shakespeare but I can deliver the goods when necessary.    He responded with <giggle giggle giggle>”That’s what you get.”<giggle giggle giggle> “You had better not come back down here or I will give you a proper Charlie Horse.” He broke into a new fit of giggles as he ran upstairs.   2 minutes later he was alrea...

Bill Cosby once said "Kids say the darndest things." As a father of 3 children that routinely refrain from remaining r...silent. I've noticed a few categories: The crying babble THUNK! "AGGGHGHHHH!!!" Thump thump thuMP THUMP THUMP THUMP The child comes sprinting in to   the room trying to make as much noise as possible in an effort to demonstrate how injured he is. He pulls on your sleeve while donning the perfect injured face and starts to hyperventilate as he tries to tell you the story of the worst injury and injustice of all time. BC2: "DAD!!! Bibliochild1 hit me!! Itoldhimnottothrowthetoyandhedidn'tlistensoItriedtotakeitfromhimandbesafeandthenhehitme" #GASP D: "Calm down and tell me what happened." BC2: "I didn't do anything and Bibliochild1 hit me!" D: "You didn't do anything?" BC2: "No!   I was just trying to take the toy away so he didn't throw it" D: "...

 A song Captn and I were talking about. I end up listening to it all the way through every time it comes on... I thought I saw you yesterday But I didn't stop, 'cause you was walkin' the opposite way I guess I could've shouted out your name But even if it was you, I don't know what I would say We could sit and reminisce about the old school Maybe share a cigarette, because we both fools Chop it up and compare perspectives Life, love, stress and set-backs, yes So you could tell me how hard you had it And you could show me all the scars to back it And we could analyze each complaint Break it down and explain these mistakes I make I like to tangle up the strings of the puppetry But you knew me back when I was a younger me You seen Sean in all types of light And I've been meanin' to ask you if I'm doin' alright [Chorus x2] Yesterday Was that you? Looked just like you Strange thangs my imagination might do Take a breath, reflect on...

Somebody once said "necessity is the mother of invention."   Our childhood was filled with events and games that required us to amuse ourselves   using only the materials at hand. This was usually because our parents didn't think we needed the latest shiny toys; instead they taught use to make due with what we had.   It wasn't until years later when I was trying to explain some of these games to Bibliowife did I realize how strange some of the games were.   Some games were completely thought out prior to starting, other times the game would evolve mid game as new rules were added to make it more difficult to score points.   Indoor hockey I can't remember if this game came about during a particularly rainy day   or we were just too lazy to go outside.   The equipment consisted of 1 tennis ball and lots of furniture.   We were not allowed to move the furniture around so we had to make due with the natural layout of the room.   The "goal...

People sometimes ask what my brothers and I talk about.  I've often said that it really isn't that interesting and taken out of context doesn't make much sense at all.  For example Capnt Punc: I'm the other brother FCJ: We call him the OB DoubleDTender: The ob? Bibliotender: Yea, OB and this is GY.  They call me N DoubleDTender: Why N? Bibliotender: OB,GY,N DoubleDTender: I don't get it…. … She didn't get it and we were giggling too hard to try and explain.  Sure it doesn't make sense, but it almost follows a logical pattern.  There are some nights where we find ourselves deep into  a conversation and have no idea how we got there.   During these frequent moments we usually try to bring someone else into the conversation, usually leading to their great confusion.  Sometimes a person's stupidity (or ignorance as the case may be) can be what sets us off.  We don't mean to hurt anyone's feelings but there are t...

This is a guest post... Nothing helps.   I cry less than at first.   It's been a year, shouldn't something change? I know crying won't bring him back…stupid to think that it would.   I can't help it. Most days I can deal.   I make my to do list and move. I don't necessarily move in the direction that I planned, but I plan. Where is my list? I don't know but I stay busy. I still cry.   I cry a lot in my car.   Especially when the music is playing.   I don't even drive far. Moving on with my life and keeping busy...   Is that dealing?   I don't feel any different. I am just more busy, sometimes. Many things I do while I'm "busy" are the same things I did when he was here.   He didn't do the busy stuff.   He did the projects and fix-its and the building and many of the "together things" like driving and helping and leading. It's the alone times, like now, that make me cry.   I didn't plan it…it ...